HE SAID: U2

electricalstormeraI can remember my first year at Windridge quite vividly (those of you who know me, stop laughing).  The year was 1991 and my counselor must have played the album Achtung Baby 50 or more times in the month that I was there.  These were good times.  Already a somewhat avid music fan, as soon as I returned to civilization I went to the local music shop and made my father purchase both The Joshua Tree & War on audio cassette.  More good times ensued.  I fully expected to be a U2 fan for years to come.

Like most females have done to me throughout my life, this was only a tease.  U2 sucks.  The albums they have released since Achtung Baby are all AWFUL.  I’m not even talking about their experimental albums like Zooropa or Pop, because I respect bands who try to eff around every once in awhile, but albums like All That You Cant Leave Behind or No Line on The Horizon scream “generic crap that is going to sell because we are U2 and I am Bono so shut the fuck up!”

You know what though, it’s not even really the music.  When you create such amazing albums from the get go, I understand that they are hard to live up to.  Just take a look at Weezer or Pearl Jam (two of my favorite bands).  It’s their attitudes.  Bono walks around like he is God’s Gift to this Earth, prancing around in lame sunglasses all the time, and even claiming he has taken the biggest dump of all time.  On top of that, they have a guitarist who calls himself “The Edge.”  You are almost 50 fucking years old, you aren’t cool enough anymore to call yourself anything but David Howell Evans.

Believe me, I know U2, and Bono, have done amazing things (Band Aid, Live 8, Hurricane Katrina relief, hundres of other things), it’s the self-righteousness they bring to the table while accomplishing all this.  When Bruce Springstein or Eddie Vedder talk about political change, it feels like they are truly invested in it; when Bono speaks, it seems as though he is only doing so because he feels like he should.  I am not claiming that this is actually the case, only how it appears to me .  Maybe this will change once Bono takes off his goddamned shades.

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