HE SAID: Random Facebook Friends

As someone with 1,009 Facebook friends (I did have to look that up, I don’t have it memorized, promise), it’s hard for me to sit here and say that random facebook friends are a bad thing.   It’s not that I think they are especially a ‘good thing’ either, but the bottom line is – fuck it.

I was watching a random doubles match at Roland Garros yesterday, met some girl from Prague who was dating one of the players.  Guess what?  We are now friends on facebook.  Maybe one day I’ll be in Prague and she can show me around, or I’ll show her around all the hoppin’ spots in Stowe.  More than likely though, we will never talk to each other again.  But, again, fuck it.

I ran into a girl I went to camp with ten years ago, she served me a chocolat au pain and a double espresso.  Later that night I realized, much to my chagrin, that we were not already facebook friends.  So obviously I friend requested her, and she accepted before I woke up the next morning.  This one could actually pay off though, as I think she is taking me out on the town later this week and maybe I’ll meet a single french girl that actually likes American guys.  Probably not though.

I met a former tennis pro and now commentator, Justin Gimelstob, for about 90 seconds two years ago, I friend requested him last month.  I haven’t been to his page since, and probably never will.  But fuck it, he is a celebrity.  Having celebrity friends on facebook makes you that much cooler.

I was fraternity brothers with the kid that started http://www.collegehumor.com and now comment on his wall all the time in the hopes that he might comment back, just so people will see I am friends with him.

I think my 1,010th friend might just be my father, who friend requested me about two months ago.  I’m not so sure I’m ready for that though.

The main reason I have so many random friends though is because I am a good person…seriously.  I can not, for the life of me, bring myself to decline a friend request.  If I don”t know the person than yes, I don’t bother.  But just last month a kid I did not like in middle school, whom I exchanged no more than 10 words with from 5th-8th grade, and whom I haven’t spoken with since added me, and I accepted.  Maybe it’s not that I’m a good person, I think deep down I was just hoping I’d check out his page and see what a failure he’d become.   He seems to be crushing life in a way I can only dream about, but seriously, fuck it.

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