Jeremy And The Fantasy Baseball Blowout

NIFER: dude.  what did you do to the fantasy league?

JEREMY: what?  am i being blamed for this?

NIFER:  why did two teams drop out because of you?

JEREMY:  it wasn’t because of me.

NIFER:  what happened?

JEREMY:  they tried to pass a trade, it got vetoed by 4 people.  so it didn’t pass, they were pissed.  is someone seriously telling you its my fault?

NIFER: yes.  most definitely.  was asked “did you hear about jeremy and the fantasy baseball blowout?”  which, by the way, should be the title to a short story or movie

JEREMY:  what the fuck

NIFER:  did you motivate the trade veto?

JEREMY:  i discussed it with your brother.  but two others vetoed as well.  what the fuck

NIFER:  hahahaa.  this is awesome.  i’m laughing

JEREMY:  im calling your brother.  ive been a part of countless leagues, and never seen anyone react to a veto like this.  they asked who vetoed and why, i answered.  then i wrote this (which is clearly a takeoff on a few good men, and in my mind, genius) …

you want more answers?
….Son, we play in a fantasy league that has standards and those standards have to be guarded by the teams in this league. Who’s gonna do it? You? You Sartdogs? You have the luxury of not knowing what I know: That my post, while somewhat self-interested, probably saved the integrity of this league. And my existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, saves the integrity of this league. I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the fantasy league that I provide, and then questions the manner in which I provide it. I’d prefer you just said thank you and went on your way. Or maybe next year you should start a league. Either way, I don’t give a damn what you think you are entitled to (Editors Note: Jeremy can not take full credit for this quote…besides Aaron Sorkin, writer of A Few Good Men, it has been used in fantasy message boards past)!

tell me thats not amazing

NIFER: it is amazing

JEREMY: thanks.  i’m super pissed off right now if i’m being blamed for this

NIFER: you’re implicated.  maybe it was your use of the word “son” that set him off.  or … maybe, i’m going to go out on a limb here, he missed the reference.

JEREMY: how could you not see that’s a joke!

NIFER: i wish a few things.
1. that i hadn’t dropped out of the league this year
2. that i had been in the room when he read that if we’re going off the theory that he missed the reference
3. that i had been included on the call where the two of them decided to drop out of the league
because i bet it was serious as all hell.

JEREMY: you have no idea how heated i am

NIFER: i have an idea.  i also, as an addendum to my previous list, wish i were sitting next to you now.


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