HE SAID: Winter Olympics

I really enjoy the Winter Olympics.  I’ll throw that out there right from the get-go.  I am really getting into them this year (in no small part because I have very little else to do).  I watched the Men’s Cross-Country sprint yesterday…holy shit those guys go balls out.  And especially this event comes during a total crappy time for sports – post superbowl, prebaseball, middle of an already boring basketball and hockey season, and just before March Madness.  It’s almost perfect…almost.  Allow me a few short paragraphs to highlight some of my dislikes.

#1 – Men’s Figure Skating – No, not the figure skating itself.  What they can do on a pair of skates is nothing short of amazing.  I actually have a hard time getting into it because I am not able to fathom what they are doing.  But that’s  not the main issue I have with Men’s Figure Skating.  In many winter olympics sports in addition to figure skating (speed skating, alpine/nordic skiing to name a few), they are forced to wear tight-fitting outfits in order to better compete.  But only in Men’s Figure Skating do they look overtly homosexual.  I’m not gay bashing, I don’t hate the outfits…I simply don’t get it.

#2 – Shaun White’s hair – He won gold last night, and it wasn’t even close.  He is one of those athlets that when he does something people think “that will never be done again” along the lines of Tony Hawk, Michael Jordan, Tiger Woods and Tonya Harding.  But I’ve had enough of his flaming locks.  We’ll probably read his biography in 20 years and learn they were extensions anyway, Agassi style, so just save us and cut them off now.

#3 – NBC coverage.  Fuck you NBC, I hate the way you cover sports with all your tape delayed bullshit, and I hate Bob Costas.

#3a – Facebook Groups shitting on NBC for lack of ski coverage – Guess what assholes? You guys created that group not realizing that alpine events were delayed and delayed because of the weather.  Though I do ultimately appreciate anyone ripping on NBC.

#4 – Canadian coverage – Being in Vermont, I am the lucky recepient of a broadcast station from Canada…so far I have used it as a form of ambien.  Are all Canadians this boring? Or only the people they choose to host their olympic coverage.  I know I’m used to US sensationalism, which annoys me as well, I’m looking for something in between.

#5 – Curling – I refuse to believe this is a sport.  Anything that relates most closely to shuffleboard (a GAME played by either old people or drunken frat boys on a spring break cruise) should not be considered for International Olympic Competition.  Although watching teammates yell at each other is somewhat entertaining; and makes me think all Olympic sports should allow trash talking…imagine some of the possibilities when an American went up against a Frenchman…

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