HE SAID: Words with Friends

May 27, 2011

There are 3 facts that I know about myself: 1. I am a nerd…I like to think of myself as one of those, “cool nerds,” but even that probably isn’t true. 2. I am in love with my iPhone4. 3. In direct relation to fact #2, I am, quite literally, obsessed with the ‘Words with Friends’ application. At this time, I have approximately 12 games going…and yes, all those games are with actual friends, not with strangers. I’m not that desperate. It might even interest you to know that I am 1-0 all time against “She Said.” In fact, she was forced to resign because she didn’t play a single move after I started a game. I don’t want to say that’s typical of her, but it’s typical of her.

The beauty of having so many games going at once is pretty much at any given time, I have a move to make. This means that I can now cancel all the magazine subscriptions I have (ESPN, SI, & Entertainment Weekly for those wondering), not to mention stop risking my laptop further damage. Why? You might ask. Because I can bring my iPhone with me into the pooper and make a move. And if it so happens that it is a rare occurrence where I have no moves to make, I’ll play some Angry Birds. Of course, the former might be exposing myself to some future preparation H use, but eff it. The games are that fun.

Not that Words with Friends is perfect, mind you. As always, I do have some issues. First and foremost, they need to figure out how to eliminate trial and error from the game. I mean for effs sake, I threw down S-E-X-T-O-N with ‘x’ on a triple letter and the word on a double word for  a substantial amount of points. Turns out the word refers to a church official in charge of ringing the bell. You think if we were playing Scrabble and someone challenged me I would’ve been confident that it was an actual word? Hell no. I only played it because I just went to a Martin Sexton concert last month.

Along those same lines, and this is not the responsibility, but cheating simply should be punishable by banishment of the application. There are some people I play who play multiple words in a row that reek of cheating. There is trial and error (lame), and there is using words that Charles Rudolph Quirk (can you believe there is a Wiki page for ‘famous linguists’?) has never heard of (wrong). I feel like I should be able to point this out to the developers of Words with Friends, and on a case by case basis they can decide to delete the app from the wrong-doers phone and not allow it to be downloaded again. Too harsh?

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SHE SAID: Case of the Mondays

October 18, 2010

Happy Monday!  Hearing that is kind of like reading Have a Happy Period on the Always panty liner.  It’s just not going to happen.

I spent a large chunk of my weekend working on my son’s Halloween costume.  While brainstorming ideas (I was pushing for ghost or Karate Kid – he chose a Clone Trooper from Star Wars) we decided that we would rather make it because we had fun with last year’s home-made octopus.  It took a while to get my mind around the idea of making a clone trooper costume since the on-line suggestions included the words, heat gun and PVC piping – both of which seemed a little intense for my limited skill set.  So, working with some huge cardboard boxes we got started on the suit of armor.  Anyway, like I said, we were working on his costume and while bing-ing for ideas and images, I found this site full of great ideas for women.

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This is a link to a great slide show of Edward Horsford’s images documenting the innards of water balloons bursting.

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I suck at this game.

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But I fared better at this one – hint, you have to play off your own words so choose wisely.  Or at least better than I.  I have a feeling Jeremy and I could have a lot of fun and waste a lot of time playing this one.


SHE SAID: Case of the Mondays

June 13, 2010

I can’t seem to get the cast of Arrested Development back together, and trust me I have tried.  Orbit’s new dirty shorts are as close as I can get.

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I have been watching a little bit of soccer lately … a little thing called the World Cup is keeping me entertained through the recent rain storms.  Frankly, I’m surprised I hear women griping about having to watch this.  Not only is it a fantastic event and the sport a dazzling display of athleticism, but the gentlemen who partake in this sport are by and large GORGEOUS.  Here is a ranking of the arguably best looking soccer players in this World Cup.

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Here are some absolutely gorgeous shots of underwater ballerinas. After my underwater base jumping video last week and this, it seems I’m going through an underwater phase.

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For all you designers and artists out there, here is a fun game.  Note: non-artistic types will not be entertained by this while sober.

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Twitter.  Some would argue it’s a waste of time.  This golf game, which one could also argue is a waste of time, relies on twitter – the yardage of your shot is based on how popular your word is on twitter in the last 20 seconds.

In related news, the New York Times has banned the word tweet.  Jeremy banned it almost a full year ago from his vocabulary.  That’s right, folks: my boys a visionary.


SHE SAID: Case of the Mondays?

May 24, 2010

It was obvious that Britney Spears started packing on the pounds when she threw back 17 frappachinos from Starbucks a day.  Just in case she’s looking or a new high calorie liquid habit, here is a list of the 20 worst drinks in America and their caloric equivalent in food.

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For those of us who love food but hate the hassle of coming up with a menu or recipe: this little gem.

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Also, not sure how I feel about this in relation to my age, but Pac Man turned 30.  He’s not dealing with it really well.

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Too hungover to digest and reflect upon your graduation speech yesterday?  Here’s a graduation message for any new fledgling graduates out there.  Also, congratulations.  I remember feeling incredibly both terrified and unbound.  The world was my oyster and I was hell bent on exploring and dominating it.

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The Mississippi River is now closed to the Gulf of Mexico due to severe oil contamination.

I was kind of hoping that some lessons would be taken away from the oil spill in the Gulf.  Maybe, at the least, that we would take some time to step back, assess the problem, the causes of the spill and how to best move forward safely.  Instead, 19 new permits have been issued for more drilling. The spin is that these are not new drilling projects, but new work on existing projects.  Apparently preventing another disaster is not high on the to do list.

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I’m running in a marathon in 6 days.  In light of this, I thought I would revisit one of our posts from last September on running long distances.  Jeremy is a HUGE fan.


HE SAID: Golf

May 19, 2010

I am not as bad as Charles Barkley

So I joined a country club this year. The most rinky dink country club I think I’ve ever seen, but still I am a member.  Bear in mind this is a 9 hole course, the clubhouse looks closer to a squatters mecca than it does to most clubhouses, and last time I went to play (at 1 pm) there was not a soul on the course or in the clubhouse…yet a board still had to approve my membership.  Anyway, that’s besides the point, I could write a book on the many idiocracies surrounding golf (the pants, the mens lounge, the shitty golfers who think they are good, social memberships, yada yada yada), but in this post I want to focus on the game itself, and why I continue playing even though most of the time it is similar to torture.

For a frame of reference, you should know that I label myself an “accomplished hacker.”  I am past the point where I hit a ground ball every other shot, thought admittedly that does still happen. For 9 holes, I’m generally in the 45 range, and for 18 closer to 100 (I fall off the map after hole 14…when I am loaded I’m going to build a 14 hole golf course).  My score is high because I can’t hit any more than one or two really good shots each round.  Generally when I play, I’m frustrated more than I’m happy, I get blisters from walking, and I attain what many refer to as “swamp ass.” Doesn’t all this, mainly my success rate, beg the question – why the eff do I bother to play?  Or for that matter, considering I’m better than the average person I see on the course, why does anyone bother playing?

Not my future wife.

One reason I know is not true is to meet females.  I’ve been to many a courses around New England, and saying they are not ripe with single women in their 20′s would be the understatement of the century.  The only women I see at the golf course are usually there to appease husbands…I hope the man is not forcing his significant other to play by agreeing to seem some stupid movie like “Letters to Juliet” later that evening, yet I digress.

Is there anything else in life that so many people do shittily yet continue.  Think about it…I am completely satisfied with a shot only a couple of times in a 4 hour round.  Add into that the ass sweat and there really isn’t a rationale reason I should be playing.  Oh of course there is the argument, “well you are outside in the nice weather, perhaps enjoying an adult beverage or two with some friends.”  I can do the same thing at the beach (where there are lots more single females, and I don’t have to wait for four senior citizens to use the ocean like I might have to for 18 straight holes).  But I guess I’ve already answered my own question…it’s that one shot that brings me back…that one drive that I actually hit straight…or the sand shot that somehow manages to hit the pin…or the beer at the 19th hole.


SHE SAID: Golf

May 19, 2010

I think golf is ultimately more of a man’s game because where else can you be in someone’s presence for 4 hours or more and not have to talk?  I’m surprised more couples don’t play together.

golf

One could make the argument that I’m not that into golf because I stink.  And yes, that is a huge part of it.  I swing hard, it just goes even faster into the woods.  I try to keep my head down and end up missing the ball.  I think you get the picture of what a round of golf with me is like.

Golf is similar to shuffleboard in that anyone can do it who isn’t confined to a wheelchair.  If you’re 300 pounds overweight, your swing will be different than the 90 year old woman suffering from osteoporosis, but you can both be accomplished golfers.  Somewhere along the line, golf acquired more street cred than shuffleboard, and I’m still trying to figure out how that happened.  I think it has something to do with greens fees.

Which brings me to my next point: golf is ridiculously expensive.  While I’m all for preserving expansive areas of undeveloped land, I don’t think you should have to pay out the wazoo to walk a piece of land with a club.  Between the membership fees, the cart fees and then what it costs to get a bag of clubs together, I could have built my own tennis court and redone my kitchen.  And, if I want to spend my time with painful people, I already have plenty of occasions, and I certainly don’t need to pay money for more.

But golf also takes up time, and by time, I mean, eons.  And I don’t have four hours of free time to spend chasing a ball on a regular basis, which would be required in order for me to enjoy playing without my current level of frustration.  If I want a work out, I run, hike or go for a bike ride.  If I want to play a game, I play tennis, corn hole or volleyball.  All of those can be accomplished in around an hour, maybe a little more.

It made sense that my grandfather was into golf.  About all he could do was walk and it gave the poor guy something to do during the day since he wasn’t working and his wife had died.  And his passion for the sport, well, I chalked that up to having literally nothing else to do other than offer us grand kids twenty five cents for drinking our milk.  Then my dad got into it, but he was also getting up there and it made sense for the most competitive person I’ve ever known to attempt domination of a new activity when his fitness level was less and less impressive and he was approaching his golden years.  Once he couldn’t put his kids to shame athletically, he said he took up a game requiring more skill than athletic ability.

I’ve wondered whether he did it to get away from life for four hours.  If being out on the golf course was kind of like going on a high mileage run in that your mind is able to free itself from the minutia of your daily grind.  For four hours, he wasn’t an employee or boss or father or husband or brother or son.  Or maybe it doesn’t get that deep at all.  Maybe it really is just about getting a ball in a hole.


SHE SAID: Case of the Mondays?

March 8, 2010

Lost

I was encouraged to get into this show over the summer and spent a considerable amount of rainy nights catching up.  Thankfully the weather was pretty terrible for a large part of the summer.  Had I realized I could have started the season fresh and blogged about the show having not watched a minute prior … well, I could have knitted several afghans and had several thousand people reading my bog.

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Work Games

No, not something you’re going to play while sitting around the conference table.  These actually make it look like you’re working.

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Lunch Lady Land

A teacher, who for some unknown and probably very insane reason, decided to eat her school lunch every day for a year and blog about it.  I’m guessing it had something to do with her being bored from living in the mid-west.  Although, her writing is very entertaining and it’s kind of like a public flogging – hard to refrain from checking out.

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Leto

Remember when Jared Leto was hot?  Apparently, he’s doing everything he can to reverse that.  I think the metal studded pants make the look.

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Localvores

“…locavorism may be about more than smug new-wave chefs blissing out over Vermont ramps and heirloom garlic: “Locavorism” might be the key to food security and better nutrition for all.”