SHE SAID: Case of the Mondays?

June 1, 2010

This is in my top ten youtube videos ever.

I don’t know who made it, or why.  And something tells me that them uniting might be a terrible idea and bad for mankind … but I still love it.  Thank you, producer, for making douchebags mildly endearing.  I found myself almost rooting for them at the end.

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I love denim.  Jeremy might argue that I have a bit of an addiction.  This would be the antibody.

Also, this reminded me of the SNL “mom jeans” skit – “give her something that says I’m not a woman anymore, I’m a mom.”

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I regularly school Jeremy in Trivial Pursuit.  The co-creator has passed away. Hopefully this doesn’t mean a delay in release of the Trivial Pursuit: American Idol edition.

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Al and Tipper Gore have decided to get a divorce and announced it via a mass … e-mail?

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A 2 year-old addicted to smoking.  His mother “can’t remember” how it started and is motivated to make him quit because of the cost.  Poor guy.  Seeing a two year old correctly wielding a cancer stick is more than mildly upsetting.  Check it out here.

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SHE SAID: Denim

April 29, 2009

I have long had a love affair with denim.  Jeans, to be more specific.  In the winter, I wear them every day, which is saying a lot since I live where winter lasts about 8 months.  There is nothing sexier to me than a guy in jeans and a T-shirt if he can pull it off, and I love wearing the same.

When I first went to boarding school, my friend Gusty introduced me to the idea that jeans could have different fits.  We were skiers and had legs on the bigger side – the relaxed fit from the Gap was the jean of choice, thankfully peg rolling was out at this point.

Chip and Pepper, Sevens, Citizens, William Rast, Joe’s Jeans, Earnest Sewn,  Rich and Skinny, J Brand, Paige, Current/Elliot, True Religion … these are works of art to me.  Some of them can even create the illusion that I actually have an ass.  I have been with friends who are ecstatic when they try on a pair of jeans that enhances their body.  It’s a superficial thing, I’ll be the first to admit, but it’s so great to feel like you’re looking good.

The first time I tried on a pair of True Religions, I was in New York with my sister.  I had never felt so hot in anything in my life.  It felt awesome – those jeans were sold.  My sister watched me checking myself out for a few minutes, then pulled the sales associate aside and asked for the “real” mirrors.  There was a small standoff and a few minutes later we were standing in the back office of the store with an accurate mirror.  I still loved the jeans, although they definitely didn’t look nearly as slimming.

The downside?  A pair of Levis or Gap jeans sell for $40 – $60 and  I feel like it’s a steal if I find one of the designer pair for under $200.

Because of this, I operate under the theory of a dear friend’s mom: Price Per Wearing.  If I buy a pair of $200 jeans and I wear them twice, we’re already down to $100 per wearing.  Now just figure if I wear them for 200 days (completely possible given my penchant for denim).  Those jeans only cost $1 every time I wear them.

The theory is a stretch, but I embrace it because it makes me feel less insane.


HE SAID: Denim

April 29, 2009

Honestly I have no issue with your post whatsoever.  True, I give you (and indirectly all females who spend this absurd amount of money on jeans) plenty of shit, but it’s in a lighthearted manner.  The reason is pretty straighforward, I’d rather stare at this than this.

 I guess my issue with expensive jeans lies with the Male Population.  I personally don’t spend more than about $50 on a pair of jeans, and to be honest, I almost bought a pair of $100 jeans once (in a Lucky Brand outlet), which would have allowed me to sleep at night as well.  Once I start looking at jeans anywhere North of that, I begin to seize and start to feel like A-Rod (the very definition of a metrosexual).

The ironic thing is, if there was any guy who would benefit from Designer Jeans it would be me, as I am very similar to a Conehead, lacking an ass of any kind.  I just can’t bring myself to even try on a pair of jeans that will give me more of an ass.  Besides, if a girl can’t appreciate me for who I am on the inside than I don’t want anything to do with her anyway (I’ve been telling myself that since the 7th grade, and I almost believe it)!

I guess the only thing I disagree with Nifer on is this horsecrap rationalization theory of Price per wearing.  Shut the fuck up and just admit that you spent an obscene amount of money on denim.  When I purchase a BlueRay player sometime in the not so distant future for $400, do you think I’m going to tell myself every time I watch a movie – $200/viewing. $133.33 repeating /viewing, $100/viewing,” and so forth? No, I’ll rationalize it because I love watching movies, so I might as well watch them the best way possible.  And all you females out there who spend $200 on jeans need not use Price per wearing as your reasoning, just admit to yourself that you are vain and you want to look as hot as possible, all the time.  Again, I’m a guy, I appreciate that about you…I’d rather stare at this than that.