HE SAID: DJ or band?

April 29, 2010

Dare I ask, market research Nifer?

I jest.  I agree with what you’ve written regarding a dj, they can be extremely fun at big parties…but they should be limited to things like sweet 16s, Bar Mitzvahs and perhaps even engagement parties, not a wedding.  See I’ve boiled this down the same way an NFL scout thinks about the draft.  A DJ is like that solid Offensive Lineman you know is going to be a contributor to your team for the next decade, but he is not going to carry your team to the Superbowl.  Basically, his ceiling is only so high.  A band on the other hand is more like the franchise quarterback you take with a top 5 pick expecting to ride him to Disneyland.  Now, I’d equate a Bar Mitzvah, big graduation party, etc to a mid to late first round pick, you don’t need and aren’t expected to get a franchise guy back there.  But a weddding on the other hand, a wedding is like the first pick…you need to blow the shit out of the water with this one.

Only you need to do it better then most NFL teams.  Do some actual research, make sure the band you are getting to going to absolutely crush it.  Don’t hire these guys (yes, I know it’s Lady Gaga but how boring of a perfomrance is that…)  You would probably end up remembering your wedding in the same way the Raiders recall Jamarcus Russell or the Charger Ryan Leaf.  Or how the Broncos will end up remembering Tim Tebow (yes, I know he was a late first rounder but it was probably the worst reach of the draft). Instead, check these guys out…they would be your homerun draft selections like Peyton Manning (i just threw up in my mouth having to write that) and Ricky Williams (not only will he run for lots of yards, he’ll get you high!)

Bottom line(s) are these: your wedding day is one of the more special days you’ll ever have…at least until you split up three years later (hey, statistics don’t lie).  Don’t celebrate it using a DJ who premixed his shit on is MacBook then tries to look cool pretending to spin.  Get a band, a loud rocking band.  The other bottom line is I’ve been looking for any excuse for making fun of the Broncos for drafting Tim Tebow in the first round.